Thursday, November 24, 2011

++ DeSiReS ++

in previous entry,
i did tell u how i wanted to marry so badly.
i put on hold some of my dreams just that to chase this ONE dream.

now that i'm married,
sometimes i feel jealous with bunch of single ladies out there.
i just dont understand what i really want actually.

juggling between my career,
house chores,
super active growing Zareef,
sometimes -sweet-sometimes-not Z,
n many other things,
i want an escapade so badly!
i need a retreat.
i want to go out with my friends.
so free.
so happy.
without bothering about what to cook,
who's taking care of d laundry,
the piling up dishes in d sink....
[d list will go on like forever...]

it's been some times i enjoy reading novel on the bed.
Zareef is almost 9months.
so it has been more than 9months i stop doing something i like.
i dont enjoy reading when 80% of my concentration is on him.!
u never know.
this little Zareef is super active!

am i complaining?
i hope i dont sound like one.
this is just a piece of sharing how my life has transformed
from one phase to another.

this is what i want.
a marriage.
but why do i get jealous when peeping thru single ladies' lives?

am i not happy with my marriage?
Hell no!
despite cleaning diapers moments, sleepless nights,
house chores burdens,
i cant imagine anything better than
being sandwhiched by Z n Zareef everynight.

i guess i just miss my single moments.
d late night movies.
d window shopping.
reading novels n eating chocolates as much as i want,
errr...d scandalssss...

sometimes i even secretly plan to have a holiday by myself!

nothing better than having a family.
but watching late night movies without worrying abt house chores
is also a bliss!
it is just that i have had my time.
it's a past now!
no matter how badly i want to go back to that era,

here i am.
taking life from different perspectives.
LIFE cant make it good for me.
i have to live mylife to the best.

after all,
what's better than growing old with d loved ones?

everytime i feel jealous with single ladies,
i just need a knock on my head.
n i whisper this to myself...

"what a girl wants, isn't always what a girl needs.."

1 comment:

farrah said...

hey syg..u shud be grateful bcause u r 25,a superwoman with two beautiful boys...ko kene pi spa niyh, urut2 massage sikit..hehhehe ;))haishhhh single lady mcm aku ni mmg la best tp smpai bile nak enjoy je kan!! ;))