++ bLueS ++

i remember one year ago at d very same date,
i woke up in one of d hotels in Malacca.
we made a sudden plan to go there on d new year eve.

today, just a minute ago,
i woke up n ran to d loo,
finish my small business n lay back on d bed.
then woke up again n ran to d kitchen to take a slice of cheese cake to savour my tummy.

last nite Z asked me what is our plan for today.
i couldnt help but to smile and frown at d same time.
i used to b d mastermind of plannings!
pantang Z cuti je, i will have a lot of requests to b fulfilled.
but now...i dont have the passion to do almost anything! T-T

nak mandi ~ malas
nak iron baju ~ malas
nak makeup ~ malas
nak decide nak pakai baju ape ~ malas
nak keluar ~ malas + x larat

haih.
i dont understand what hormones are hitting me right now.
how can i be this lazy?
i have not done cooking for almost a month now.
:D
i rarely do d dishes as well.
in fact, i didnt do d laundry that Z had to sent piles of our clothes to d dobi down there.
:D :D

i have been falling sick for twice in december.
n having nausea n sometimes i vomitted too.
mayb these r causing me being me right now.
dulu sakit camne pon rumah mesti kemas n bersih.
boleh la nak masak lauk 3jenis.
nowwwwwww....
T-T

i hope i will pass thru this 1st trimester successfully.
n i hope all these sicknesses r going to stop soon.
*crossing fingers*

skrg baru tahu rase susahnye mengandung.....................

++ Terrrrrr.... Ke?++

pregnancy ni kadang2 boleh bawak kontroversi jugak dalam hidup mana2 pasangan.
siapa yg follow,mesti tau yg dari time Zareef lagi aku termengandung.
sbb memang dok cerita kat sume org yg aku nak tunggu setahun...
tapi tu lah..rezeki Allah nak bagi...

same goes for 2nd pregnancy.
x plan pon nak get pregnant.
tp lekat.
pastu sume tanye, ko tak plan ke.
kate tak nak.
yeap.
to b honest,
aku mmg x nak lgi.
tp aku x amek pills,latex,or guna apa2 technique.
kira macam kasi redah je kan.

bukan ape...
aku sangat percaya pada ketentuan Allah.
kalau dah memang tertulis di Lof Mahfuz akan lahir seorang insan dari rahim aku pada sekian sekian tarikh,for sure aku akan get pregnant jugak.
makan lah pills apa sekalipun.
kuasa Allah mana mungkin ditanding.
jadi aku n Z rasa ini adalah yg terbaik utk kami.
Allah tahu ini yg akan menambahkan lagi sinar kebahagiaan keluarga kami.
jadi aku terima dgn lapang dada n penuh rasa syukur.

pasal masters,
depends pada tahap kesihatan aku.
kalau sihat,aku ambil 2papers next sem.
kalau masih yoyo,
aku angkat bendera putih siap2.
lagipon aku takut jgk kalau Z dpt tawaran keje tu.
kalau dok jauh2 susah jugak aku nak cope everything alone.
x mampu...
again... Allah knows the best.

aku tau ade ramai kawan2 n sedara yg mencuba utk mendapatkan anak.
macam2 usaha.
macam2 teknik.
ramai yg bercerita pd aku.
nasihat aku,
jangan berhenti berusaha.
tp jangan pula put on too much pressure.
percayalah.
perancangan Allah adelah yg terbaik.
kalau bukan sekarang,
insyaAllah suatu masa nanti.
moga kita semua diberi peluang untuk merasai nikmat keajaiban yg satu ini.
amin.

++ oF PreGNaNCy ++

it is challenging.